Man Suspected Of Attempted Botany


KIEV, Ukraine — A man is being investigated as a suspect for attempted botany after he was pulled over in traffic for a broken tail light. An open packet of sunflower seeds was found in his car. He insists that he was only going to look at them, and maybe eat them, not plant them.

Although, plants and trees are cut down to make room to build potential profit-making buildings and parking lots, some sprouts are still slipping through the cracks. For decades, people have been terrorized with dandelions. But law enforcers become concerned that more sophisticated botanists could be involved when there are sunflowers, tulips or ginkgo trees around.

Authorized community gardens have been set up to control over-forestation, while these graffiti florists continue to deface public parks and private weddings with barrages of floral arrangements.

Convicted botanists could face up to 85 years in a perennial institution.